"I'm still figuring out who I am, but I know I'm not who I was." -Brendon Urie

© SALVATOREH

merriamwebsterdictionary:

reasons why winter is better than summer:

  • little to no insects (◕‿◕✿) 
  • sweaters all the time (◠△◠✿)
  • the air is nice and fresh smelling (◡‿◡✿)
  • sometimes it snows and you get out of school \(◕‿◕✿)/
  • snow is pretty (´・ω・`)
  • no pollen (▰˘◡˘▰) 
  • it gets darker faster so theres more nighttime and more time to look at the stars (ᅌᴗᅌ* )
  • everything is dead just the way i like it (⊙‿⊙✿)




partybarackisinthehousetonight:

son: dad what’s for dinner?
dad: dinner? nope. i said 1000 RTs or no dinner. sorry
son: we haven’t eaten in days
dad: 1000 RTs or we starve 



booforce:

my friend who snorts cocaine won’t eat cookie dough because it’s bad for you



howidiotic:

pls don’t expect me not to wear the same jeans every day bc that is unrealistic and unfair



verticulars:

If you can’t deal with my sarcasm. I can’t deal with being your friend. 





departured:

finding songs from your favorite artist that you haven’t heard before

image



brianmalik:

if i sigh loudly enough will all of my problems go away 



un-leash-ing:

egberts:

*goes to a party and awkwardly follows friend around the entire time*

*goes to a family reunion and awkwardly follows mom around the entire time*


psyducked:

such-a-retardis:

catswithbenefits:

why ride a rollercoaster when you can ride me 

Because rollercoasters can actually make me scream.

image



saturdaydetention:

this is so terrifying

saturdaydetention:

this is so terrifying



sebastian-cock:

My talents include being able to identify every one of the 5000 songs on my iPod by the first chord and eating more than the rest of my family combined



soufflesandbowties:

50% of my jokes are self deprecating and 50% are self congratulatory like i’ll say “wow its hot in here…. just like me” and 5 seconds later point at a trash can and say “me”



kanyewesticle:

i dont ship…i yacht. im not a low budget bitch